There is something in the soil of Kerala, or perhaps in its air, that gives an irreverent and sardonic bent to the character of Malayalis, Not surprisingly, some of the most celebrated folk heroes of medieval Kerala were pranksters and wits. And among them, none had a better – or worse – reputation than Naduvelippat Bhattathiri, who once played a humiliating practical joke even on his guru, though gurus in India were generally revered by their disciples as next only to god.
Naduvelippat was at this time living in a Brahmin seminary in Thrissur in central Kerala. pursuing higher studies in the Vedas after completing his basic education at home. Though he was a keen student, he had a weakness for women, which was unbecoming in a youth of his calling. Oddly, the head of the institution, a Namboodiri, also had the same vulnerability, and maintained a concubine in the town, despite being a married man. The guru tried to keep the matter a secret, because such liaisons were forbidden to married Namboodiris, though unmarried adults of the community were free to have, were indeed expected to have, such affairs.
The Namboodiri was under the impression that no one knew of his infatuation, but of course everyone knew. And Naduvelippat took full advantage of it. Soon it became a nightly routine at the seminary for the guru to sneak out to visit his mistress after his wards had gone to bed, and for our young scholar to sneak out soon after, to go on his own jaunts.
Naduvelippat had no regular concubine, but spent the night wherever fancy and opportunity took him, and he normally got back to the seminary early in the morning, well before the Namboodiri returned.
But sometimes he would oversleep because of his nocturnal labours, and on such occasions he was often caught stealing back, and had to suffer the mortification of being roundly berated by the Namboodiri.
To avoid this embarrassment Naduvelippat took to going to the local temple straight from his tryst and spending some time there in worship, so that whenever the Namboodiri caught him, he could truthfully say that he had been to the temple. But one day he got involved in a caper, and could return to the hostel only late at night. That got him into serious trouble, for the Namboodiri, who had not gone to his mistress that night and was lying awake waiting for him, caught him sneaking in. This could not be allowed to go on, the Namboodiri decided. He had to enforce discipline.
“Hereafter you should sleep only beside my bed,” he sternly ordered. “And you should not go to the temple in the morning for worship, but say your prayers sitting where you sleep.”
Naduvelippat meekly promised to obey the guru, but bided his time to find some means to free himself from the restrictions.
That was not easy, for the Namboodiri now stopped visiting his concubine, feeling guilty that it was his own liaison that gave the youth the excuse and the opportunity for his escapades.
The arrangement however did not last long, for the guru fretted as much as the disciple under the new regimen. Eventually, after a few weeks of continence, the guru’s ardour got the better of him, and late one night, after making sure that Naduvelippat was asleep, he quietly slipped out of the building and set out to his concubine‘s house.
But Naduvelippat was only pretending to be asleep. As soon as the guru left, he followed, and, taking a shortcut, reached the woman’s house well before the guru, and hid himself near the door. When the Namboodiri arrived and called our to the woman, she opened the door and brought a pitcher of water for him to wash his feet. Taking advantage of this diversion and the darkness of that new-moon night, Naduvelippat quickly slipped into the house and hid under the woman’s bed.
He did not get much sleep that night, but woke up well before dawn and began chanting sacred hymns, sitting near the bed on which the lovers were sleeping.
That jolted the Namboodiri awake.
“Who’s that?” he cried, startled.
“lt’s I,” said Naduvelippat humbly.
“You! What’re you doing here?”
“Following your instructions,” said Naduvelippat.
“What?”
“Your order that I should lie only beside your bed and say my prayers on waking up — that’s what I’m doing.”
“Enough! Enough!” growled the guru, and hurriedly got up to return to the seminary. Naduvelippat followed him, keeping a few mannerly paces behind. On the way the guru paused and turned to his disciple. “Look, now on you can sleep wherever you want and go wherever you like,” he told him. “I give you the freedom. But please don‘t harass me hereafter.”
“As you wish,” Naduvelippat submitted solemnly.
~ ~ ~
Naduvelippat never grew out of his mischievous ways, and took particular delight in deflating the bloated egos of the vain and the pretentious.
One of his favourite targets later in life, while living in Thiruvananthapuram as a courtier of the raja of Travancore, was the prime minister himself, a plump and voluptuous dandy who was always dressed in a superfine, sheer dhoti fastened with an ornate and jewelled gold girdle.
One day, seeing him ambling along in the palace compound, Naduvelippat approached him with a show of utmost respect, bending low and covering his mouth with a hand. The grandee looked down on him with disdain and asked sternly, “What do you want?”
“A humble request,” Naduvelippat supplicated in a low voice.
“What?”
“May I kiss your arse, please?” he asked. “Just once?”
The prime minister whirled away in anger, his face crimson, and hastened to the raja to report the impertinence of Naduvelippat. “This man is making my life miserable with his affronts,” he complained. “Just now when I was coming here, he said something obscene to me, which I cannot even repeat to Your Majesty.”
When the raja summoned Naduvelippat and questioned him about it, he maintained that it was not true that he had insulted the prime minister. “What happened is this,” he said. “When I saw him dressed in a transparent dhoti and adorned with gold waist ornaments, I had a strong desire to kiss his plump bottom. It wouldn‘t have been proper for me to do that without his permission, so I asked him. I don’t know why he is making such a fuss about it. If he didn’t want me to kiss his bottom, all he had to do was to say so, and that would have been the and of the matter.”
The raja could barely suppress his smile, but dismissed Naduvelippat saying, “I’ll think over this matter and decide what to do. You may go now.”
The raja had never liked the prime minister going about in transparent clothes, but was at a loss about how to handle the matter tactfully. Naduvelippat‘s prank gave him an opening, and he now issued a general order making it mandatory for everyone to Wear a second cloth around the waist while appearing in court.
Excerpted with permission from Tales Once Told: Legends of Kerala, Abraham Eraly, Penguin Books.
Naduvelippat was at this time living in a Brahmin seminary in Thrissur in central Kerala. pursuing higher studies in the Vedas after completing his basic education at home. Though he was a keen student, he had a weakness for women, which was unbecoming in a youth of his calling. Oddly, the head of the institution, a Namboodiri, also had the same vulnerability, and maintained a concubine in the town, despite being a married man. The guru tried to keep the matter a secret, because such liaisons were forbidden to married Namboodiris, though unmarried adults of the community were free to have, were indeed expected to have, such affairs.
The Namboodiri was under the impression that no one knew of his infatuation, but of course everyone knew. And Naduvelippat took full advantage of it. Soon it became a nightly routine at the seminary for the guru to sneak out to visit his mistress after his wards had gone to bed, and for our young scholar to sneak out soon after, to go on his own jaunts.
Naduvelippat had no regular concubine, but spent the night wherever fancy and opportunity took him, and he normally got back to the seminary early in the morning, well before the Namboodiri returned.
But sometimes he would oversleep because of his nocturnal labours, and on such occasions he was often caught stealing back, and had to suffer the mortification of being roundly berated by the Namboodiri.
To avoid this embarrassment Naduvelippat took to going to the local temple straight from his tryst and spending some time there in worship, so that whenever the Namboodiri caught him, he could truthfully say that he had been to the temple. But one day he got involved in a caper, and could return to the hostel only late at night. That got him into serious trouble, for the Namboodiri, who had not gone to his mistress that night and was lying awake waiting for him, caught him sneaking in. This could not be allowed to go on, the Namboodiri decided. He had to enforce discipline.
“Hereafter you should sleep only beside my bed,” he sternly ordered. “And you should not go to the temple in the morning for worship, but say your prayers sitting where you sleep.”
Naduvelippat meekly promised to obey the guru, but bided his time to find some means to free himself from the restrictions.
That was not easy, for the Namboodiri now stopped visiting his concubine, feeling guilty that it was his own liaison that gave the youth the excuse and the opportunity for his escapades.
The arrangement however did not last long, for the guru fretted as much as the disciple under the new regimen. Eventually, after a few weeks of continence, the guru’s ardour got the better of him, and late one night, after making sure that Naduvelippat was asleep, he quietly slipped out of the building and set out to his concubine‘s house.
But Naduvelippat was only pretending to be asleep. As soon as the guru left, he followed, and, taking a shortcut, reached the woman’s house well before the guru, and hid himself near the door. When the Namboodiri arrived and called our to the woman, she opened the door and brought a pitcher of water for him to wash his feet. Taking advantage of this diversion and the darkness of that new-moon night, Naduvelippat quickly slipped into the house and hid under the woman’s bed.
He did not get much sleep that night, but woke up well before dawn and began chanting sacred hymns, sitting near the bed on which the lovers were sleeping.
That jolted the Namboodiri awake.
“Who’s that?” he cried, startled.
“lt’s I,” said Naduvelippat humbly.
“You! What’re you doing here?”
“Following your instructions,” said Naduvelippat.
“What?”
“Your order that I should lie only beside your bed and say my prayers on waking up — that’s what I’m doing.”
“Enough! Enough!” growled the guru, and hurriedly got up to return to the seminary. Naduvelippat followed him, keeping a few mannerly paces behind. On the way the guru paused and turned to his disciple. “Look, now on you can sleep wherever you want and go wherever you like,” he told him. “I give you the freedom. But please don‘t harass me hereafter.”
“As you wish,” Naduvelippat submitted solemnly.
~ ~ ~
Naduvelippat never grew out of his mischievous ways, and took particular delight in deflating the bloated egos of the vain and the pretentious.
One of his favourite targets later in life, while living in Thiruvananthapuram as a courtier of the raja of Travancore, was the prime minister himself, a plump and voluptuous dandy who was always dressed in a superfine, sheer dhoti fastened with an ornate and jewelled gold girdle.
One day, seeing him ambling along in the palace compound, Naduvelippat approached him with a show of utmost respect, bending low and covering his mouth with a hand. The grandee looked down on him with disdain and asked sternly, “What do you want?”
“A humble request,” Naduvelippat supplicated in a low voice.
“What?”
“May I kiss your arse, please?” he asked. “Just once?”
The prime minister whirled away in anger, his face crimson, and hastened to the raja to report the impertinence of Naduvelippat. “This man is making my life miserable with his affronts,” he complained. “Just now when I was coming here, he said something obscene to me, which I cannot even repeat to Your Majesty.”
When the raja summoned Naduvelippat and questioned him about it, he maintained that it was not true that he had insulted the prime minister. “What happened is this,” he said. “When I saw him dressed in a transparent dhoti and adorned with gold waist ornaments, I had a strong desire to kiss his plump bottom. It wouldn‘t have been proper for me to do that without his permission, so I asked him. I don’t know why he is making such a fuss about it. If he didn’t want me to kiss his bottom, all he had to do was to say so, and that would have been the and of the matter.”
The raja could barely suppress his smile, but dismissed Naduvelippat saying, “I’ll think over this matter and decide what to do. You may go now.”
The raja had never liked the prime minister going about in transparent clothes, but was at a loss about how to handle the matter tactfully. Naduvelippat‘s prank gave him an opening, and he now issued a general order making it mandatory for everyone to Wear a second cloth around the waist while appearing in court.
Excerpted with permission from Tales Once Told: Legends of Kerala, Abraham Eraly, Penguin Books.
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