A new book of short stories for young readers shows how feelings affect their thoughts and actions

“Boo! GOT YOU!”

It was Susie, who then went off into peals of laughter. It was just so funny how startled Frenny got. Frenny really wished Susie wouldn’t do that.

“Could you not do that, please?”

“Why? It gets you, doesn’t it?!”

“For one, we’re not four years old, and for another, it’s not nice of you.”

“Hey, it is even funnier now and the world’s not nice to me so why should I be to anyone?” Susie ran towards the bus, tossing her head back and laughing uproariously.

Frenny felt her whole body stiffen and then she sighed, tucked her arms close to her torso and began to walk. Her head was tilted downwards, carefully avoiding eye contact and hoping no one else would see her or talk to her.

No one did. Susie and Amit were in the back row sharing jokes and laughing together. And the girl who sat next to Frenny on the bus was talking to her friends on the other seat.

There was only one thing worse than being actively frightened of people, and it was being invisible to them. Every time Frenny needed something, she had to say it more than twice. “Excuse me, ma’am!” “Excuse me, sir!” Even at the canteen, she was so hesitant that she almost never got what she wanted. By the time she got to the counter, the good stuff was over. She was always the last to be picked in team sports, and the first to be injured. She didn’t even correct her science lab partner when she called her Fanny or Filomena or Falguni. Sometimes she thought it was her own fault. Frenny was just so fed up with being disrespected all the time. She was so done being a pushover.

Frenny had a surprise in store for her that day. Susie and Amit were waiting for her when she stepped off the bus. As usual she was the last one out, waiting in her seat until everyone got off.

Frenny raised her eyebrows at them and clutched her backpack, afraid they were going to do something to her. She felt ganged up against. There was a queasiness in her stomach, and she hoped she wouldn’t throw up. Her knees were also about to buckle.

“Hey,” Amit said.

“Hey,” Frenny replied nervously.

Susie rolled her eyes. “Oh, god, you two will take forever. Frenny, we’re doing a thing, want to come?” she asked.

“A thing?” Frenny said.

“Yeah, a thing. For you know, the thing.” Susie looked at Frenny expectantly.

This time Amit rolled his eyes.

“What Susie means, Frenny, is that we all have to participate in the class annual day, right, and the two of us, I mean we wanted to put up a recital and it’s better with three. Susie here will play the flute and I wanted to perform a rap thing, which is better with two voices, so would you join us?”

He shot Susie one of those “that’s how it’s done” looks.

“No, thanks,” Frenny said, and began to walk back home.

Amit looked bewildered.

“Hey, hey, hey! But why not?” Susie asked.

“I…I can’t get up on stage,” Frenny replied.

“It’s only in class, you know.”

“I know. I can’t.”

“Will you at least consider it?”

“No.”

“Isn’t that a bit rude of you?”

Frenny stopped walking. She sighed, thumbs tucked into the straps of her satchel, and swung around.

“Did you ask others?”

“Yeah, they were all taken.”

“And you assumed I wasn’t?”

Susie and Amit glanced at each other.

“Yeah, we kinda counted on that.”

Frenny smiled, sadly.

“Yeah, well. There’s a reason for that, isn’t there?”

Susie ran up to her.

“That’s not true, third wheel. We want you because we need you. It’s not like people pick us first either, but who cares, right? We’ve got to find our own tribe and hang out. Who needs them?”

“Courage isn’t not being afraid…everyone’s afraid. I bet even teachers get nervous on stage. No one’s ever that brave all the time. I mean, what’s the worst that could happen?’ Sku piped up.

They stared at him. They hadn’t seen him there, between them, hovering, wisely listening. Frenny looked like she fully expected all things to have a voice.

“Everyone gets a voice but you, huh?” Sku quipped at her.

Frenny was stunned. “But…how…”

Amit smiled. :Never mind Sku, he’s like that. He gets you. Even when you don’t want him to.”

“You don’t get punished for your fear, Frenny. Your fear, it punishes you enough.” Sku said. “You don’t deserve to have bad things happen to you. You’re as worthy of love, recognition, praise and support as the next kid.”

“But…but…then why do bad things happen only to me?”

“Do they? Or are you personalising it?”

“What does that mean?”

“Maybe you just feel like it’s happening only to you. Maybe everybody fails sometimes, even adults. Maybe some people just don’t care if they do look silly, or goofy, or wrong. Maybe they see shadows and they think, hmm, no silly monster is going to get me.”

“But I do. Is that wrong?”

Sku smiled. “No, Frenny, nothing you feel or are, is ever wrong. And you should know that. There is no perfection you have to reach. You are perfect as you are, mistakes, fear, flaws, and all. Scary things happen to everyone, including me, but we can’t allow that to stop us from living, you see. If you identify with the fear, the fear identifies with you. You live in fear then.”

“Yeah,” Susie piped in, “what he said. Okay, what’s our worst-case scenario? The whole class will laugh at us for a few days, but we’ve got each other’s backs, haven’t we?”

Amit nodded. “At least think about it?”

Frenny gave a slight nod as well. But she knew thinking about it just made the ball of lead in her stomach grow bigger and heavier and it was all she could do to stop having to think about it.

That afternoon, listening to Taylor Swift and munching on caramel popcorn, Frenny thought that maybe it would not be such a bad thing. You know. To try. Even if she was afraid.

Excerpted with permission from Oh, So Emo!: Dealing with Those Big Feelings, Gayatri, Hachette India Children’s Books.